Becky's Top 20 Simpson's Quotes

#20

"Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else - and it hasn't - it's that girls should stick to girls' sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such." - Homer Simpson

#19

"Oh Neddy, it was horrible. I thought we were heading for eternal heavenly bliss in Paradise." -Maude Flanders

#18

"It's Crap-tacular." -Bart Simpson

#17

"Me fail English? That's unpossible." -Ralph Wiggum

#16

"What a day, eh Milhouse? The sun is out, birds are singing, bees are trying to have sex with them - as is my understanding." -Bart Simpson

#15

"Way to breathe, No Breath." -Jimbo Jones

#14

"Part of this D-minus belongs to God." -Bart Simpson

#13

"Step aside everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty. 'Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.'" -Homer Simpson

#12

"And I contend that those tourists were decapitated *before* they entered the Krustyland house of knives." -Krusty the Clown

#11

"Son, a woman is a lot like a refrigerator, they're about 6 feet tall, they make ice... Aum.. Actually a woman is more like a beer, they look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one, but you can't stop at just one, you've gotta have another woman..." -Homer Simpson

#10

"Oh pardon me Santos, if that is your real name, Bart Simpson. But your phony credit card is no good here. So make like my pants and split." -Comic Book Store Guy

#9

"I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked! Oh, gotta go. My damn wiener kids are listening." -Homer Simpson

#8

"Owww, my freakin' ears." -Todd Flanders

#7

"Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! ...Except the weasel." -Homer Simpson

#6

"Hey, since when is Christmas just about the presents? Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of this day? The birth of Santa?!" -Bart Simpson

#5

"To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!" -Homer Simpson

#4

"It says 'Let's Bee Friends', and there's a picture of a bee on it!" -Ralph Wiggum

#3

"What?! You doctors have been telling us to drink eight glasses of gravy a day." -Homer Simpson

#2

Ned: "Who's up for a big bowl of nonfat ice milk?"

Todd: "I want wintergreen!"

Maude: "Unflavored for me."   -The Flanders Flock

#1

"Oh yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth, and when they bark they shoot bees at you?" -Homer Simpson

Take The Simpsons Wonder Quiz
This site looks best when viewed with the Simpson Font. Download it here.